I met many challenges as the oldest child of immigrant parents. One of the major challenges was being forced to take on parental responsibilities for my younger sister because my parents were busily working long hours at their restaurant. Their business had placed tremendous emotional toll on their marriage and on their relationship with their children. My sister and I had to take care of ourselves without much guidance or supervision. While I became the caretaker and peacemaker in the family, my sister voiced her frustration and anger with the family by acting out in various ways in high school. In many ways, her behavior served as a wake-up call for the whole family. It forced us to be honest and real with one another. It gave us permission to examine the various underlying unmet needs, frustrations and emotional isolation we had all experienced for many years.
These challenges were the impetus for my desire to pursue psychology in college and eventually a career in mental health. In college, I was deeply impacted by a course on Asian American families. At the time, the course felt very much like God's gift of personal therapy. It opened my eyes to the many hidden shame and struggles common to many Asian American families. It was such a relief to know that I was not alone in my identity and family struggles! I became aware of the array of mental health issues that exist in the church when my professor shared her research on the secret presence of domestic violence in many Korean American Churches. I felt my heart break over the things I experienced and heard. At the same time, I also felt convicted in my desire to see God's healing go forth in my family and other Asian American families in the church. I am grateful that throughout my college, graduate school and professional journey, I have seen the awesome transformative power of God to heal and restore individual lives and family relationships.
I got involved in AAWOL because I believe that there is still a lot of shame and stigma towards mental health in Asian American churches and families. AAWOL creates a place for me to give voice and to empower other Asian American women in the church to obtain the support and healing they need. It has been exciting to have the professional network to serve alongside other AAWOL sisters in our respective spheres of influence, but more importantly, I have appreciated the personal friendships and mentoring that I have been able to cultivate with my sisters in AAWOL. The times that I've spent with them -- whether formally at a retreat or informally over a meal -- have strengthened and renewed our soul. Through our personal stories and prayers, we have been able to connect on a deeper level and I have felt energized to serve and lead in greater capacity.
I am so grateful for the strengths, wisdom and gifts that my AAWOL sisters bring to me and for the reminder that I never lead alone, but always in community. I hope you will share your gifts with us and join the AAWOL network!
Beverly Chen, MSW, LCSW, serves as Assistant Dean of Student Emotional Health of Harvey Mudd College in Claremont, California. She is also an adjunct professor at Azusa Pacific University and has a private
practice in Claremont. To contact Beverly, please send your inquiry to AAWOLblog@gmail.com.
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